Working on your self-esteem:How healthy self-esteem helps you to become a better seller.

Working on your self-esteem:

How healthy self-esteem helps you to become a better seller.

“A depressed seller can not convince anyone”

The way you think, feel and talk about yourself, your value and abilities is known as self-esteem. It is the truth about yourself which only you can tell yourself. 

Have you never seen someone that is highly respected, greatly attractive, very famous and popular, poised and perfect, but yet, deep down in him, still value himself as not worth being respected? This means that low self esteem comes from your very decision as a person, and background of development. 

If your environment did not give you good self esteem, then it is your responsibility. This is because; low self esteem can be very destructive to your personal life, career, destiny and fulfillment. 

It is your duty and your right to choose how you should see yourself and abilities; because your fame, wealth, or stage presentation doesn’t cover your self-belief, instead helps people to speak more of hate-speech against you and offend you more, as people say that “public adulation is no-guarantee of self belief”. 

People with low self-esteem are known to control very little or fragment of their lives, and therefore achieving very little of what they are supposed to achieve in quantum. Self esteem is how you rate yourself within you and before others. 

How much do you value your belief, thought, body, life, opinion etc? 

You can find out if you have low self esteem by asking yourself the following questions:-

How do I think about myself, my attitude, and my beauty, apart from what others people are saying? 

Do I like myself at all? 

Am I a good person at all?

Do I deserve to be loved or served by anyone? 

Do I really deserve to be happy in this life? 

Do I deserve to rule or give orders that people shall abide by? 

Answers that you give in response to these questions tell you whether you have low self esteem. You have to be frank and sincere with yourself. People who have low-self-esteem find it difficult to answer “Yes” to the above questions. 

So, the self esteem meaning can be further placed as the amount of courage or self trust which we have about our ability to think and our ability to cope with the primary challenges we face in life.

It is the courage in our belief, in our being worthy, deserving, entitled to assert our needs and wants, achieve our values and actually enjoy the fruits of our labor.

 The greatest discovery you can make is the ability to find out that you are 100% responsible for your value, thought and achievements. 

Self -esteem itself is subject to us. It is the gauge at which we place it, that it shall be. It has no power its own to shift or move. 

Self esteem says so much about our achievement in life, because they are the feelings that come from what think we can do, be or get. 

These feelings have a lot to do about what will be coming our way whether positive or negative. 

Self esteem is all about how our Psyche experience thought that we have about ourselves. And how we estimate our selves determines how much money we can be earning from our selling market situation. 

Living in a state of low self esteems as an entrepreneur can be a very dangerous phenomenon towards your business. 

And if you have found yourself there, just find out where your problems are coming from. Get people to care for you, and actually care for yourself as well, because people who have low self esteem find it difficult to make a sale. 

From Where Does Self Esteem Come?

As we grow-up from childhood, we had some experiences or encounters with different people and activities as well as environments with which our psyche morphed and built the image of our self-worth and senses. 

When we were growing up, our successes and failures and how we were treated by the members of our immediate family, our teachers, coaches, religious authorities and peers, all contribute to the creation of our self-esteem.

 An adult who has a healthy self-esteem received the best gift from his childhood stage, probably in many ways; the most important is the praise they were given for accomplishments.

 Children, who are addressed with respect and who were listened to, also develop good self esteem in adulthood.

 When a person experience some type of success in school or sporting activity and is being hugged often and given attention, such a person is likely to have a healthy and positive self esteem.

 If you have good self esteem, your skill will increase, and the more successful sales you make, the greater you self – esteem. 

This means that it all start from successes and celebration, on the other hand. 

Notwithstanding, adults who have low self-esteem are those that were given harsh-criticism. Those who were yelled at or beaten in their commonest mistakes and were given little or no attention by those who were supposed to – the closest neighbors or parents.

 Instead, they were ridiculed when they experienced failures in their early lives, they were made to feel they had to be perfect in the very beginning of their lives, and also made to think that the failures they experienced in their early childhood is the failure of their whole life time. 

You can see, and the sadder thing here is the result that these feeling can be giving out of those people treated that way.

 They will limit themselves in everything, thinking that all things are impossible or that they cont achieve anything on their own unless it was given to them. 

Therefore, how we feel about ourselves comes from how people treated us when we couldn’t help the situation.

 And this can affect our whole lives. People, who feel that they are likeable and loveable, are the people with good esteem; they have better relationships. And they are more likely to ask for help and support from friends and family when they need it.

 They are those who believe they can accomplish goals and solve problems and are more likely to do well in their aspirations. Having good self esteem helps you to accept yourself and live your life to the full. 

You can find it easier to make friends, have better relationship with peers and adults, feel happier and find it easier to deal with mistakes, disappointments and failures. 

They are also more likely to stick with something until they succeed. It takes some work, to build, but it’s a skill you will have for life.

 In summary, as we have seen where low self esteem comes from—our childhood experiences and failures encountered while growing up. 

The good news is that if you have low self-esteem, like almost everyone else, you don’t need to worry or feel depressed, you can overcome the issue. It is not as difficult as you may think. 

In fact, all you need to do is to find out, understand and make use of the proper techniques that you will find in this book on how to fight how self-esteem.

How to counter low self-esteem with great self-image and belief: 

Every habit or attitude you formed in this life that you want to break; with determination and confidence, you can actually break them by replacing them with another better one. 

Self-esteem is a product of aggregate habits that we form through life challenges and the way we handled them. 

All of them come from understanding, conceptions thought and resolution we had about how others treated us, or how nature, in general, did. See how you should start:

Stop that negative thinking and self-criticism: 

 Have you been focusing on your weakness or inabilities? You have to start now to learn how to replace such negativity with positive-energetic belief. Stop criticizing yourself too-much instead, find a positive thing to counter the bad thought with.

Instead of thinking, that you are weak, failure, worthless, invaluable; counter those thoughts that limit your abilities and replace them with those that eliminates negativity to the core, and boost your strength for achievement.

Tell yourself that you failed last time because you didn’t give enough try or because you quitted before the final bell rang;

 Not that you are incompetent. 

Tell yourself about the powers you have above your opponent, with which you would have won, if you persisted in that trial. 

Remember for yourself each day, about the many things about you that you are glad to have. If you do so, very soon, you will start to dramatically fall in deep love with yourself and highly value yourself.

Aim at doing something rather than being very perfect:

 Some people become tyrannized in the yoke of perfection, thinking that they would have to be 100% correct at every first shot. 

And this thought therefore, limits them from trying at the first place.

 Look, instead of getting yourself down-tied with thoughts like, “I will stay home to learn all the game principles and become perfect before going out to the playground, so that I will not be ridiculed by anyone”. Think something like, “I am going out there now to show my talents on this game, even if I am not perfect today, by repeating the next day, I can become better”. 

Think about doing what you have passion for, and do it without fearing people’s thoughts or opinions.

Don’t settle for Mistakes: 

Life is not all about how many times you failed but how soon you actually rose up after each fall. “The down full of a man is not the end of his life”.

 Even if you went to the playground and played poorly, it doesn’t mean that you are poor, there is no way you should become perfect at that beginning. Period!

 We should start to understand mistakes and failures as our helpers, not as our worst enemies.

 As a business manager you are, more mistakes improve your confidence on yourself and hope for success. 

Mistakes are gifts from God which we are given as a tool for perfection. No one can become perfect without making enough mistakes.

 I mean that nobody never made a mistake. You should not want to always make the odd, it is quite unacceptable. So accept that it is your right to make mistakes in every new start, because everyone else does. You are not God; you are human being and remember also that “To err is human”.

 We must know that mistakes are parts of learning and if you don’t want to make mistakes, learning can be hard for you.

 So, each time you make mistakes, remind for yourself that a person’s talents are constantly developing, and everyone excels at different things. You don’t need to be a guru before you talk to somebody, speak your own mother- tongue and express how you feel. It is your right.

 If the person doesn’t understand it is his fault. 

Engage in new things:

 You feel better about yourself when you have done many things well. The more several the things you are capable of doing, the larger your mentality develop and the more confident and happy you become with your life. 

So try to engage with different activities, that will help you come across your destiny or talent and then you take pride in what you have developed.

Understand your ability to change situation and know those you cannot:

 If there is something in your life that you are unhappy with, which you can change, then changes starts now. But if it’s something that you cannot change, start to work towards loving yourself that way you are. There are things you cannot change, they might include: you height, you family back-ground or origin.  

Become goal driven:  

The reasons you always think that you are incapable is because you achieve things by accident or rather have never achieved any.

 Because you have never set a new goal that was totally inspired by you; because you get something as you go along with your life or because people only give you what you have. 

Nothing boosts your confidence and self-worth-belief better than goals; No matter how small or big. 

Thinking about what you like to accomplish and then making a plan for how to do it, then work it out, that’s goals. 

Self improvement might be your next goal, then you can go and mingle with ‘shameless’ extrovert in clubs, classes, social-networks, social-group, show them your talent, perform as they perform and grow as they grew.

  Stick with your plan and keep track of your progress. By doing this, you will experience what is known as “Flow”. And you will be happier and more successful. 

Exercise daily : 

You’ll relieve stress and be healthier and happier when you keep fit. You will trust your gut, abilities, health, emotion and strength. You will be more flexible, sensitive, approachable and loveable. And be happy indeed. 

Have Fun: 

Have you ever found yourself thinking something like, “I would have more friends, if I were thinking”? Or “I would be visiting the gym, if I ever a daughter of a politician” or “I would fall in love with any girl.

 If I were handsome and rich enough to provide all she may need”? If you do think those ways or any of them, you are under-estimating yourself. So don’t do that. Have fun. 

Do what gives you joy and eases your life now that you are alive for nothing last forever. 

Have fun, it’s your right, to spend time with the correct  people you care about and doing the things you love, Relax and have a good time. You worth being given a good treat for a whole day. 

Live with confidence: 

When you start to live with confidence, instead of fear, people will respect and fear you more and yourself image will improve, say what you want broadly without fear of how people think, Rise up for yourself and your right. 

Rise up against that guy that has been troubling you in your work place. Do what you say, or what you want to do and do what you should do without fear of any party. 

Reasons you should give attention to your confidence is because people will sense your self-confidence and respond to you accordingly. 

If you don’t have confidence in yourself, people will hardly believe in you to give you any contract or sign a solid agreement with you.

Do what you enjoy doing or whatever you know how to do:

Those interests that do capture your attention and requires enough focus when you come across it then, making you to forget about everything else; for instance, playing football, running, swimming, cooking, dancing, gardening, climbing, painting, drawing, website-designing, reading,  or writing. 

By these, you will soon find yourself, more competent, accomplished and capable afterward, great weapon against low self-esteem! Continually and more frequent undertaking in these your new hobby is advisable in order to keep you on the flow, so that you will become happier, healthier and wealthier very soon. 

Stop being self centered:  

Low self esteem is often accompanied by too much focus on the self “I, Myself” and “Myself”. It is not good! 

When you think you should be going all alone, you seem awkward, Not-understood and dumb. 

You can’t cope well with others when compulsory issues arises and you can easily get thrown off on little issues that go wrong especially in a group you belong. 

You can now short of necessary information. Easy things will seem hard for you, because you depend only on your own understanding. 

You will always think you are still a child and will not have the courage to care for others, therefore being left alone to help yourself, which you perhaps might not be capable of. 

So, your choice is to surround yourself with important people who matter to you, and among them pick some friends to care for. You will soon find out that you are not alone. 

Count your Blessings:

 Do you know what it means to keep journals? A journal is a daily record of what you are able to achieve on that day. It is also known as the diary of achievement.

 In this process of self –esteem optimization, you should not overlook this journaling and you should not fail to review and make use of what is being recorded.

 Stop writing your problems and things you are unable to achieve. Write instead, only your blessings and things you have achieved.

 Also remind for yourself that your abilities that have not yet been unlocked are unlimited. 

This will boost your power as human to do more than you even think you can.

 When you begin journaling it mighty initially seem difficult, but if you continue, you will soon develop a hardly mental and written list of self esteem boosting memories that you can often refer to.

 But if you fill your dairy with things you are unable to achieve, your belief will go no linear direction with what you recorded about yourself, and therefore limiting what you can be able to achieve.

 For instance, your thoughts and beliefs will be like: “How do I think I can succeed, for I have tried as many as listed here and been unable to achieve anything; no need for my life again”.  Such negative thoughts.

Your Inabilities will occupy all the places your glory would have been inside your heart, making you more vulnerable. 

Recordable little achievements don’t even have to be too much a great one. Those things you think they are not worth telling as an achievement; can be a very crucial one. Such might include: Being able to consistently complete weekly exercise schedule or even completing your first day in the week.

This is because, the most common thing you have achieved, has many millions of people in the world that tried to, but couldn't. Something like: being able to clean up your house on each scheduled time, washing your clothes by yourself and many other home activities.

 Some other professions like :

passing your driving test (although you were nervous) is awesome; Completing a course (although doubting you would) is an achievement; being able to play team football full-time (even though you didn’t score). 

You are doing your own business, where you are the boss and are able to cater for all operations in the system.  This is a very tremendous achievement.

 All these are worth being counted – every success you have, both ability to buy a comfortable bed for yourself and being able to cook a delicious meal that your family enjoys is a precious blessing to be counted on. 

Shake –Off the Junk: 

Anything hurtful or destructive that someone told you or made you to feel; you don’t have to take it too heavy upon yourself. 

Some of external opinions, suggestions, criticisms and hate speeches should at times be taken with grain of salt.  

We should allow them to talk with their mouth, they speak that way because they didn’t understand you and that’s their fault, not yours. 

They are not you and can never be, so allow them in their foolish ways. They maybe are doing according to how they feel within them. 

They are doing like that because they are not feeling what you are feeling. And you know yourself more than they know you. So why are you worried when they used abusive words? They are just speaking out of their ignorance and foolishness. They know that you are not a fool and you know it as well. They may just be asking or guessing; of which they are probably wrong. And those issues belong to them. I always advice people to often take others behaviors towards them, with a grain of salt, because everybody’s thought can never be same. We are in different world, just as our faces and DNA are different. Each person is thinking and behaving according to the kind of breast –milk he is fed with, their mental issue and their level of understanding or intelligence. Remember as I told you before, that it is the offending parties issue and not yours.

Resolve once and for all that your self esteem is defined by you and you only. You are the only one who can correctly define yourself and be able to estimate your worth and abilities. You don’t want to rely on someone else for your happiness. Don’t beg anyone to like, love or respect you. You are hundred percent responsible for your happiness. Another person’s view of you is of less or no necessary use as regards your self esteem and happiness. This is because these both come from inside of you. Once you embrace this knowledge fully, the great transformation begins. Do all these, to respect yourself; you worth it.